Bed to Crib Transition

For most mothers of toddlers, "the big transition" consists of moving their child from their crib to a "big kid" bed. Not for this family! Last night was our first night of transitioning our little guy from our family bed back to his own crib. At the beginning of the year, he did wonderful...fell asleep in his crib and slept through the night. When we pulled him out of daycare for a stretch and Grandma was watching him, he got into the habit of napping with her. And I always loved the comfort and closeness of sleeping with my children as well, so I picked up this habit and transferred it to our nightly routine. Thus, the comfortable, comforting habit of sleeping with mom and dad every night developed....which developed into an absolute fear of anything to do with his crib. I tell myself that I believe in the Family Bed and I am very much pro-attachment parenting. But I know, for all parties involved, that it is best for him to start sleeping in his own bed and own room again. So, last night was just the beginning. It took an hour and a half to get him to sleep, stay asleep, and sneak out of his room at the beginning of the night. Then he woke up twice during the night  2 am-something and 5:00 am, and guess who got take care of soothing him back to sleep both times? This girl! That consisted of rubbing his back and head and then easing myself to the floor, where he was still aware of my presence, sleeping on his hardwood floor and reaching through the bars to maintain contact with him long enough for him to fall deeply asleep to where I could sneak out. Guess who slept through the whole night? Husband! So much for being in this "back to the crib" thing together! And of course, since hubby got home from work only to continue doing nothing but work throughout the evening and well after I got to crawl into bed, I feel like it's unfair to ask him to share in the burden of childcare and responsibilities. This transition will be hard but I have to persevere because if we go backwards and give in, I am only working against myself. My baby boy didn't develop this desire to sleep with us on his own. I fostered it, and enjoyed it, but now for his sake and ours, it is time for him to learn to love his bed again. His room really is one of my two favorite places in the world (the other being his sissy's room) and I hope to help him learn to love it as well. It's a magical place filled with cuddly friends, warm blankets, fun decorations, toys galore, warm clothes, good books, comfort, and safety. This is my first big move towards becoming the mother I want and need to be.

From Baby to Toddler

Just over the last few months, it seems my sweet, angelic soon-to-be two year old has gone from my quiet, happy little guy to happy but a destructive, mess-making, all-boy little guy. Every day, I catch him looking more and more like a child instead of a baby. And at times, it seriously feels like lifetimes ago when he was my little newborn baby. I can remember his birth very clearly but it seems as if his babyhood went by in a blur. He is an absolute joy day in and day out and I constantly find myself thanking God for allowing me to be Mommy to one of his best angels. But I also find myself asking where this mean little streak came from. He loves to pull hair - and he does it to be mean! He knows what he's doing, he knows it hurts, and you can tell he does it when he wants to express himself in an angry way. He somewhere got it in him to start wrestling. Last week, Sissy was trying to read to him and all he wanted to do was rough-house. I was trying to wrap gifts a few days before Christmas, and all he kept trying to do was jump on my back and wrestle. This is the same little boy who threw an absolute fit before bed last night when I would not let him play in Mommy's makeup case. He would pull out my chapsticks and knew exactly what to do. He's feisty and he has a temper but he makes up for it in adorable moments and actions and overall, he's just a sweet little bundle of love! I have never had the chance to do the toddler thing before and it is definitely a learning curve. I am big on attachment parenting and believe whole-heartedly in the benefits of co-sleeping. But after last night, where M could not get comfortable and was fussin' up a storm and all sorts of sideways and all over the place in bed, I am this close to working towards getting him to sleep by himself in his crib again. Maybe I should make that one of my many New Years resolutions?  Not a single person I know supports me on my co-sleeping and attachment parenting beliefs but I want my child(ren) to feel very secure in my involvement and emotional availability to them. Another of my New Years resolutions (which I feel very strongly about) is learning how to better discipline my 6 year old and learning to say "no" and stick to it while also forming a stronger bond with her and making myself more available to her and learning to have patience with and listen to each other better. Two very big, important resolutions. I also resolve to start exercising again but if I fail now and again on that one, I'm not going to beat myself up about it. I can't wait until New Years Day to have a whole day off to get things done, enjoy time with my not-so-much-of-a-baby-anymore baby, and sleep in!!!

Come All Ye Faithful

Christmas Eve......It has always felt like the actual holiday to me instead of Christmas Day. Christmas Eve is when we get all decked out and do most of the gathering and eating and celebrating. It has always been my dream that when I had a family, we would do our celebration on Christmas Eve and spend Christmas Day out in our community volunteering and giving back, being messengers of the true meaning for the day and being vessels of God's love. My children are 6 and 1 and my husband is pretty set in his ways, for now, regarding his own traditions for Christmas. Perhaps over the years, as we get into a holiday groove together, we can develop our own traditions and I can talk him into the volunteering as well. There is nothing that makes my heart fuller than giving to others, bringing joy and hope and peace. I feel like I was put on this earth to do two things: make others' lives easier and to be a mother. My God and my children are the reason I live and breathe. Without them, I am nothing. I try to remind myself that Christmas is also not just one or two days but an entire season. And that season places a spotlight on our Savior for whom none of the giving and baking and gift wrapping would have been possible had God not chosen to give His Son to save us. So, Happy Happy Birthday to the most important man in my life, to whom I owe all wonders and blessings.

Christmas as a Chore?

Christmas Eve Eve. My first blog post. Christmas cheer and good tidings to all. It has been difficult to get into the "Christmas Spirit" this year. This December has been free of white precipitation and yesterday and today have been unseasonably warm. If anything, they're calling for thunderstorms. Christmas this year has seemed like more of a chore than anything. I started the season off by sending a 3 year old girl down in Texas a Christmas package with Christmas dress, headband, shoes, and gifts to open on Christmas day, as well as a few hygiene essentials for her Mom. I found them through HeroNetwork.com and now I'm addicted, wishing I could help every single person on the site but I have to limit myself to one a month. Then I sponsored a mom and son through the local Salvation Army and provided their Christmas gifts as well. I was so thrilled to give give give that I had completely spaced on thinking of anything I wanted to receive. The gift-giving gets so much more difficult when it comes to your loved ones though. That requires thorough care, thought, planning, organization, and execution. And I'm just not feeling it this year. Could it be that my circle of people I have to give gifts to and think about as grown? Could it be that now I feel compelled to "compete" with my new husband for our gifts for each other? I put a lot of love and thought into what I wanted to get him, but it's not much. Him? He went all out.....I saw the bank statements. I'm also struggling to stay organized and focused when it comes to life in general and so this throwing Christmas into the mix has me forgetting what Christmas is all about. It is my hope and prayer that after I return home tonight from all of the last minute shopping I have yet to do, that I take a moment to stop and reflect on the real reason for this holiday and season of giving and celebration. He is my life, my light, my salvation, and my strength. "I can do all through Christ who strengthens me." And I will do my best to turn these Christmas "chores" into cheers!